What other options are there after IVF?

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beautifulFlower
Posts: 22
Joined: Thu May 07, 2020 8:32 am

What other options are there after IVF?

Post by beautifulFlower » Wed May 20, 2020 3:40 pm

Together with my lovely husband, we have been trying to conceive for 3 years in a row! And all our attempts didn’t last with success. I had 2 ivf attempts and I hoped I’ll be pregnant. But no… I got pregnant after my second cycle and I was so happy! But for our great disappointment I had a miscarriage… It was 6 weeks of pregnancy and unfortunately, I lost it.
Of course I feel absolutely broken. I guess many women are able to understand my feelings in this situation.
I blame myself. And I think that something wrong with me and with my body. Why does my body not save the embryo?!
Anyway, I will not stop at this point! I’ll fight and I want to fulfill our dream!
As we don’t want to give up we decided to try one more IVF cycle. It will be the third one. I will recover a little and try again. Of course, I hope everything will be ok and it will be a successful happy cycle. Anyway, you know, I have some fears. I am afraid it will also last without the needed result… I am thinking what to do if the third IVF will be also failed.
What variants in such case do I have?
I have studied a lot of information on this issue. I read a lot about infertility and all that concerns this diagnose.
And of course, I have already known about surrogate motherhood and adoption. Anyway, in spite of the fact I have read a lot about all these possible options it still seems to be very unexplored. There are still so many doubts and questions.
Girls, maybe someone of you has a kind of experience in this question. Please, share what you know about it and maybe you have own firsthand experience! It will be great to get to know more useful information from you! Thanks in advance!

yemeni8victorine
Posts: 11
Joined: Wed Apr 22, 2020 2:38 pm

Re: What other options are there after IVF?

Post by yemeni8victorine » Wed May 20, 2020 3:41 pm

I'm on the same boat as you and waiting for our last cycle for about 2 weeks. I really fed up and don't want to go for another cycle.This is the last try and if it doesn't work I'll choose adoption. But for that, I have to wait for 6 months at least, because it takes 6 months to complete.
last evening, we met our local council, he gave a lot of useful info. So, I advise you to look if your local council does the same for you. It's very helpful and as you already doing IVF but later no one can stop you attending them.

GaryNormadavis
Posts: 13
Joined: Tue Apr 21, 2020 5:00 pm

Re: What other options are there after IVF?

Post by GaryNormadavis » Wed May 20, 2020 3:43 pm

Hi, I can uderstand your situation because I'm also going through the same way. I know, it really takes time to recover from that. We also think about the adoption and we already going to arrange the appointment in the few days to discuss more. Did you have the treatment private/NHS?? Maybe you will get some info or the right direction.

beautifulFlower
Posts: 22
Joined: Thu May 07, 2020 8:32 am

Re: What other options are there after IVF?

Post by beautifulFlower » Wed May 20, 2020 3:45 pm

I was really lucky to receive great support and help from my country. My previous two cycles were financed by the government. I was very happy to receive such an opportunity. But my next IVF attempt we will do in a private clinic.
As of surrogacy I heard and read that it can be rather expensive! I guess it will be needed to save some money in order to be able to conduct surrogacy abroad.
Hey, it’s rather strange that you have to wait up to six months in order to start the adoption process.
Do you know why it is so? I thought that it’s possible to start the adoption at any time. And no matter whether you have IVF or no.
Have someone here practice of adopting a baby? It will be interesting and very useful to get to know more about all the details. It seems that the adoption procedure is also difficult. I thought that it’s easy and any government will be happy if more children will be adopted from orphanages.

Kitten
Posts: 8
Joined: Thu May 07, 2020 8:38 am

Re: What other options are there after IVF?

Post by Kitten » Wed May 20, 2020 3:46 pm

In my county adoption is a long and restrictive process.
In case of surrogacy, you have the option to get tested and find out whether your underlying is ok. Going for surrogacy is a great option if you have some uterine abnormalities and they cause miscarriages.
I have had two miscarriages and can tell you that it gets easier as time passes but the grief never lets you go. I’m sure that you will be ok very soon, love you x

goodwood
Posts: 10
Joined: Tue Apr 21, 2020 4:47 pm

Re: What other options are there after IVF?

Post by goodwood » Wed May 20, 2020 3:48 pm

Hello, my darling,
Sad to realize the things are not going so nice... Can't imagine how you sense...
Soon I'm going to start a procedure named IVF, I am pretending to choose the package of 1-2 tries, but if we don't get a promised result I decided that general maternity is much more important than a biological-maternity, as for myself, and we would an adoption.
Some months ago we went to an Information meeting. You can get in touch with any agency that is located close to you and participate in the next event they organize. That was very helpful. Indeed since then, we are serious about adoption as an alternative way I would like to do even despite the fact I would have my own child. Of course, It's completely another way of becoming a parent, very challenging (none of the options is easy to choose) but I just hope it's worth trying. It's a kind of a very private matter nevertheless It is something you could think over, and attending such an info event that in fact may be very helpful to make a decision.
Wish you good luck
Xx

goodwood
Posts: 10
Joined: Tue Apr 21, 2020 4:47 pm

Re: What other options are there after IVF?

Post by goodwood » Wed May 20, 2020 3:52 pm

I am sorry not to say that I consider the UK as a nice country for adoption.
The chances are too low, but you should broaden your mind: have a newborn is not likely, but if you take into account babies or couples of little brother or sister the process may be pretty fast.

beautifulFlower
Posts: 22
Joined: Thu May 07, 2020 8:32 am

Re: What other options are there after IVF?

Post by beautifulFlower » Wed May 20, 2020 3:55 pm

Wow, thank you so much for all your replies and recommendations. It’s so great that there are places and such forums where we can talk about all these questions.

nat9roscoe
Posts: 9
Joined: Thu May 07, 2020 8:31 am

Re: What other options are there after IVF?

Post by nat9roscoe » Wed May 20, 2020 3:58 pm

Unlike many people here, we decided to go for adoption first. We failed in TTC in a natural way. When we started looking into adoption we found out how complex this process is and that it may take years and years till we'll consider ourselves as parents. I'm not saying that you'll never become a parent through adoption, it's just not suited for us.
So we went for icsi
We still want to adopt. We went to some meetings, talked with social workers and I think it's a really good thing to do.
One of my closest friends adopted a 10month old baby, she couldn't be happier. It's a rare case of adoption of that young child. As I remember correctly they try to place young kids with young parents.
They give you 6 months to make sure that you left the idea of becoming a biological parent and to make sure that you're fully invested in adoption.

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